New Hope for Bad Writers: Prizes Awarded for Lousy Writing
“As an ornithologist, George was fascinated by the fact that urine and feces mix in birds’ rectums to form a unified, homogeneous slurry that is expelled through defecation, although eying Greta’s face, and sensing the reaction of the congregation, he immediately realized he should have used a different analogy to describe their relationship in his wedding vows.”
Though it did not win first prize in the Bulwer-Lytton Contest for Wretched Writing, the above passage copped something called the Grand Panjandrum’s Special Award.
For a complete list of winners and contributions, visit the Bulwer-Lytton Contest website. Removing your tongue from your cheek will immediately disqualify you from enjoying it.
And check out our coverage of a prior B-L Award, Comparing Lover’s Kiss to a Sucking Gerbil, Molly Ringle Cops Bulwer-Lytton Crappo Writing Prize.