Expert publishing blog opinions are solely those of the blogger and not necessarily endorsed by DBW.
“As an ornithologist, George was fascinated by the fact that urine and feces mix in birds’ rectums to form a unified, homogeneous slurry that is expelled through defecation, although eying Greta’s face, and sensing the reaction of the congregation, he immediately realized he should have used a different analogy to describe their relationship in his wedding vows.”
Though it did not win first prize in the Bulwer-Lytton Contest for Wretched Writing, the above passage copped something called the Grand Panjandrum’s Special Award.
For a complete list of winners and contributions, visit the Bulwer-Lytton Contest website. Removing your tongue from your cheek will immediately disqualify you from enjoying it.
And check out our coverage of a prior B-L Award, Comparing Lover’s Kiss to a Sucking Gerbil, Molly Ringle Cops Bulwer-Lytton Crappo Writing Prize.